Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Adventures in Infertility #43

#43 Keep Those Home Fires Burning


One of the difficult things about fertility treatment is that it changes the way you look at your...*cough *cough... love life. Ahem.   

Before infertility you were hot for each other and each encounter left you feeling sexy and your relationship simmering, counting the minutes until you got to be together again.

After infertility, you are still hot for each other but each encounter leaves you feeling anxious, your relationship tense as you count down the days until your next period to see if you conceived, finally.

I scoured the internet fertility sites to find ways to help keep that lovin' feeling alive while you are in the throws of infertility treatment.  WARNING: I would not suggest this.  I have to scrub my brain with ajax now and sing hymns.  Some "Keeping the Romance Alive During Fertility Treatment" suggestions were down right nasty.  Others were....blah.  Some were do-able.

Here were two of the most helpful I found.  They are from an article on Shady Grove Fertility's website entitled, "Keeping the Romance Alive While Trying to Conceive"

The Ginger Jar Technique
“Two jars: one for you, one for your partner. In each, put 4 to 6 slips of paper with ideas jotted down -- things your partner could do for you that let you know how much they care about you. These can be overtly sexual or non-sexual, because after all, our minds are what get the ball rolling. For example, surprising some women with flowers might lead to even sexier outcomes. Each of you takes an idea out -- try it daily or every other day -- but don't tell your partner what you picked. Then follow through when the time is right and your partner is not expecting it. It's like planned spontaneity that's sure to target your lover's erogenous zones."
Try A Little Massage
"In one of our group sessions, I'll bring out some hand cream, and just have the partners apply the cream to each other’s hands and give a little massage. It's pretty incredible for demonstrating how simple yet thrilling even a mild form of physical intimacy can be."
Even if they're new to fertility treatment, most couples have some idea that their sex lives have taken on new meaning. Covington says sometimes it necessary to "commit to taking a few steps toward the outcome you want, and in most cases, couples will find that they can keep their relationship simmering (and maybe even hotter) through the whole journey together."

If all else fails you can always try a few of these lame-o AWESOME pick up lines to get the ball rolling...
"I may not be Fred Flintstone but I can sure make your bed rock"
"Can I read your t-shirt in braille?"
"Excuse me, but I'm new in town.  Can I have directions to your place?"
"You must be the reason for global warming because you're HOT!"
"Your beauty is so dangerous it needs a stunt double"


*Laughter is the best medicine right?  Why not laugh at my infertility?!  I do not mean to offend with any of these posts, it is just a way to let go a little and see the humor in our situation. Please laugh with me!

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