Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Adventures in Infertility #35

#35 You Know You're Infertile When...

You know you're infertile when you are jealous when your cat gets pregnant before you do.

You know you're infertile when you take prenatal vitamins that you know make your stomach upset but you still get excited when you feel a little queasy after taking them because it could not be morning sickness.  Right?

You know you're infertile when you entertain the idea of  writing hate mail to shows like "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"  "Teenage Mother" and "Another Teen Mom".

You know you are infertile when you retake pregnancy tests after your first one came up negative.

You know you are infertile when you pull the old, negative pregnancy tests out of the trash bin hours later just in case the developed a second pink line.

You know you are infertile when you worry about the little belly pooch your getting while taking fertility medications, not because you wanna bring sexy back but because you don't want people to ask you if you are pregnant because you are fat.

You know you are infertile when you rolled your eyes in the last Twilight book when Bella got pregnant on her first try, with her husband who had been un-dead for centuries.

You know you're infertile when you automatically calculate how many days until your most fertile day as soon as your "Aunt Flo" starts her visit.

You know you're infertile when you try and have your breakdown, crying about infertility, moment in really FUN places like...in front of your boss, at your friends baby shower, in line at the grocery store when you are checking out, or at church.

You know you're infertile because if robbers ever broke into your house in-search of money, you would just laugh and search with them.


*Laughter is the best medicine right?  Why not laugh at my infertility?!  I do not mean to offend with any of these posts, it is just a way to let go a little and see the humor in our situation. Please laugh with me!

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