Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Adventures in Infertility #29

#29 Babies AKA Invasion of the Friend Snatchers!!

We all grow, we all change, we all naturally move on, blah, blah, blah and no one knows this better than the infertiles who watch everyone else grow and change and move on with kids, without them.  To me this was the worst, most awful, terribly painful most challenging part of not being able to have kids.  All those things you shared and had in common with your other newly married friends take a back seat as soon as kids come along.  Sure they all try, you can see them trying to invite you to first birthday parties, gymboree tumbling classes, mommy and me play dates and you know they don't know what to do with you anymore still love you.  Then it happens.  BAM!  You introduce some of your friends with kiddos to your other friends with kiddos and suddenly they are all hanging out together without you because their kids are the same age and like to play together.  Children are the great equalizers, no matter your station in life, no matter your age, if you have had kids then you have something to talk about and can make some new friends.  It takes us infertiles a few times to catch on to this phenomenon I like to call Invasion of the Friend Snatchers.  But eventually you get wise to the friend snatching.  For those who are new to the game, this is how it goes down...

Infertiles: Hey (insert name of good friends who just had a baby here) you guys wanna come over and play board games and have pizza?

Friends:  Sure!  That sounds like fun we haven't been out of the house in weeks, we really miss you guys!  We will bring some soda.  Who else is coming?

Infertiles: Well not so and so because she just had a baby, and not such and such because they are pregnant and we don't want them to snatch you Um...a just a few couples from college.

{Night of Party}

Infertilies:  Everybody this is (good friends who just had a baby)!

Friends at Party:  Aw look at your cute baby!  I wasn't going to say anything but I am pregnant!Uh oh  (Other friend)  Really?  Me too! Crap  I just found out!!

Infertiles:  Wow!  That is so sad for us wonderful for you guys!

Night proceeds with NO games but lots of talk of babies and labor and poopy diapers (to which the infertiles make inappropriate hilarious comments while downing as much pizza as they can so they don't have to talk too much and reveal how much they don't know about the subject of having kids).  Everyone declares the night a huge success!  One of the best "game nights" they've been to in a long time!  Hurrah!

*Party ends with plans for all the couples to meet for dinner next week and discuss car seats and in one night 3 couples were snatched to be taken on to bigger and better things, leaving the infertiles to fend for themselves at the Empty Nester's Potluck (where everyone talks about their grandkids) and where they don't really fit in either.

Disclaimer:  Friends are not to be blamed for being snatched by other friends with kids, they are wonderful and anyone would be lucky to have them as friends and they deserve to hang out with people who have kids their kids can play with while they play board games and eat pizza.

 *Laughter is the best medicine right?  Why not laugh at my infertility?!  I do not mean to offend with any of these posts, it is just a way to let go a little and see the humor in our situation. Please laugh with me!

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